


You Were Always The One

by Nadja_Lee



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood Has Self-Worth Issues, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Bottom Alec Lightwood, Caring Alec Lightwood, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally Hurt Alec Lightwood, First Time, Fluff, Good Parabatai Jace Wayland, Happy Ending, Humor, Hurt Alec Lightwood, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Insecure Alec Lightwood, Jace Wayland is a Herondale, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Marking, Oral Sex, Possessive Jace Wayland, Protective Alec Lightwood, Protective Jace Wayland, Romance, Romantic Fluff, Shy Alec Lightwood, Supportive Jace Wayland, Top Jace Wayland, Virgin Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:54:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28411968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nadja_Lee/pseuds/Nadja_Lee
Summary: When Alec almost dies trying to reach him after he left with Valentine, Jace realize his true feelings for Alec. He gets advice on how to tell Alec about his feelings from Izzy, Clary, Simon, and Magnus. However, Alec is utterly clueless to the signals Jace is sending, convinced Jace can never love him like that. Finally, Jace decides to reveal his feelings in his own way which turns out to work perfectly.
Relationships: Alec Lightwood/Jace Wayland
Comments: 14
Kudos: 325





	You Were Always The One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kissa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kissa/gifts).



> Thanks so much to my amazing beta readers as always: Cindy and Monochromatize.  
> Thanks so much to Regina Danica for the great story banner.  
> For Kissa as thanks for the amazing moving gif and in general. Should have been a Christmas gift but RL got in the way. I am sorry about that, Kissa. Hope it is the thought that counts.  
> From my conversations with Kissa I understood she loves a strong but caring Jace, virgin Alec, smut, fluff and very importantly Jace written as a great lover. I hope I gave you that.  
> Chapter warnings: Mention of child abuse and self-harm (it is mentioned that Alec has scars from hurting/cutting himself and Jace and Alec talk about Alec hurting himself and how Jace can help). Anal and oral sex. Talk about sex, orgasms and other sex related stuff. Coming untouched, talk about stamina, coming twice (for both of them; lucky guys!). General talk of sex before having sex.

_Please read the chapter notes for detailed warnings_

# You Were Always The One

Seeing Alec almost die to try and reach him after he had left with Valentine had changed everything for Jace. He had realized that Alec had just proven he didn’t want to live without him. That he loved him fully and completely. Jace had known for years Alec was in love with him if he was honest with himself. He hadn’t consciously known it but somewhere, in the back of his mind, he had still known it to be true. However, he had been too busy seducing any female he met to give Alec any conscious consideration as a partner. He knew his skills, looks and charm made him irresistible to women and even some men and he had had his fun. However, when he had met Clary, he had realized what he wanted was belonging and love. He had dropped everything, risked everything – even his relationship with Alec – to be near her. He saw now he had been fascinated by Clary’s innocence and inner strength, but it hadn’t been a romantic kind of love.

After he had been released from his imprisonment, Jace had thought he had lost his chance with Alec since he was with Magnus now. However, that same day he was back Alec had fussed over him, worried about him and stayed near him constantly, his only focus and attention on Jace. Late that evening, when they had sat together in Jace’s room reconnecting, Alec had mentioned Magnus for the first time but not the way Jace had thought and feared. It was to tell him in a proud, happy and triumphant voice that he had tried to discover Jace’s true parentage since he had never believed Valentine would tell the truth. And he had been right. Magnus had figured out rather quickly that Jace was in reality a Herondale. Magnus had known Jace’s ancestors and had recognized a birthmark on him as well as other signs like certain traits and characteristics that made Magnus quickly put two and two together. To prove he was right, Magnus had described to Alec a ring the Herondale family owned and Jace recalled Valentine having had it when he had pretended to be Wayland. This news had changed everything for Jace. From being the best and most worshipped warrior in Idris to having lost it all when people had thought he was Valentine’s son, Jace was now back on top. Within days Jace had reached out to his grandmother who had quickly ensured he became Head of the New York Institute. He had never wanted that power but since it meant he could get rid of Aldertree he had gladly taken it.

After this discovery Clary had wisely suggested a blood test. Here Izzy had proven that both Clary and Jace himself had pure Angel blood. Izzy was eagerly and happily using some vials of their blood samples for trial work to see what impact it had. So far, she had only concluded it made the two of them superior warriors and gave them different special abilities and skills.

To Jace’s great surprise and relief he had discovered that same evening when Alec had told him he was a Herondale that Magnus and Alec had agreed to part ways as friends. After Magnus had seen what Alec would do for Jace, Magnus had decided to back off and they had both decided it was for the best and had promised to remain friends. So, the first night back Alec had done what he had always done; he had stayed in Jace’s room, just being there to talk and seek silent comfort from, making Jace feel loved and protected. Somehow, Jace was unsure who initiated it, but their hands had connected, a sign of affection and belonging. They had both pretended not to notice but neither of them had wanted to let go.

Jace had named Alec co-head of the Institute and leaned heavily on his advice as he felt Alec had always been the better strategist of the two of them. It was in his role as leader Jace had realized that Alec was being bullied and disrespected by other Shadowhunters. He made it clear he wouldn’t tolerate such behavior despite Alec’s protests that he could take care of himself. However, Jace had assured Alec it wasn’t that at all, but because he didn’t want him or others to endure such bullying. Hearing that others might suffer like he did Alec had quickly agreed with Jace that as a leader he should indeed make it clear such behavior could not be tolerated. That was Alec of course; always trying to do what was best for others.

It had been a few weeks since his first night back and Jace was determined to not waste any more time. With his grandmother’s help he had discovered there was no parabatai curse; it was pure Clave propaganda to prevent same-sex relationships. Alec’s kiss with Magnus at his supposed wedding had already made way for same-sex relationships and relationships between Nephilim and Downworlders. This made it easier for Jace to convince his grandmother to use her substantial influence to make the truth about the parabatai curse known and make such unions legal. It was not an easy process and Idris embraced progress like someone embracing a poisonous hedgehog, but it was happening all the same.

On Alec’s behest Jace had helped form a Shadow World Council with representation from all races and promote equality. This had also cemented Magnus as a leader of the Downworld and a friend to Alec and Jace in thanks for this effort. Izzy and Magnus spent a lot of time together as a consequence of this work on equality and Jace suspected there may be a spark there, something he was only to happy to see as they both deserved to be happy.

These last few weeks Jace had observed Alec with new eyes after his epiphany that Alec truly and deeply loved him. He started to notice for the first time all the small things Alec would do every day to help him, support him, make his life easier. He was always there, a calm presence in the bond and in his life. Jace barely had to think of something he wanted or needed, and Alec would help fulfill it.

It didn’t take long for Jace to know he loved Alec and admit he didn’t want to live without him just as Alec had shown him through his actions and deeds. But did he love him romantically? Sexually? He had had sex with plenty of women, but no man had ever taken his fancy. However, in the last few weeks Jace had started to notice Alec’s body in a new way. The way Alec licked his lips when he was nervous, how he bit his lip when he was anxious, how he yielded so completely under him when they sparred and Alec ended up pinned beneath him after fighting all he could, giving the match everything he had, as Alec did in all things. Jace noticed how Alec’s eyes would shine darker in those moments, when their bodies were close and he could feel Jace’s weight on top of him. What had surprised Jace was that lately his own body was responding in kind. Alec’s body was different from any of the women he had been with. He was taller and more muscular, but he had a tenderness and deep affection to his touch that even the most petite woman he had ever been with hadn’t possessed. Jace had to admit that this element of Alec really excited him; this sensitive softness inside a shell made tough by years of training and neglect.

Jace had long known Alec hungered for love and affection as he had gotten none growing up. It had taken years for Jace to realize the abuse Alec suffered as he had been almost euphoric with the change his own life had taken. Free from the man he now knew as Valentine when he had been only nine years old, Jace had suddenly been admired and worshipped for his skills from day one. He pushed himself hard but he more than exceeded expectations. Alec, however….Alec was always shy and insecure. Even now, as he fought to take on the role of the leader Jace knew Alec truly was then he could see on Alec and feel it in the bond, that Alec was nervous and insecure.

It was not until Jace one morning found himself masturbating to the thought of claiming Alec as his, being inside Alec’s body, being a part of him in the most intimate way, that he realized he didn’t just love Alec, he was _in_ love with him. And when Jace wanted something he got it. He knew Alec wanted him, but it was also clear to Jace that Alec didn’t think his feelings were reciprocated and Jace didn’t blame Alec for thinking that as he had first made the startling realization he did indeed love Alec in that way just now. After waiting for him for years, loving him from afar for years, Jace decided he was going to declare his love to Alec in a special way. But how?

Deciding he needed advice on how to approach this Jace went looking for Izzy. He quickly found her in the medical lab, running some tests.

“Hi Izzy,” Jace greeted with a smile.

When Izzy looked up from her work to give him a nod and a warm look in greeting Jace continued in a serious tone, “Izzy, I need some advice.”

“Sure. Shoot.”

“What does Alec like?” Jace asked, his gaze focused on her lips as she replied, eager for her suggestion.

“Like? What do you mean _like_?” Izzy asked confused.

“Like what makes him happy?” Jace elaborated.

Izzy frowned puzzled but then grinned, clearly thinking he was joking.

““You!” Izzy proclaimed, making Jace both feel flattered and a bit sad that Alec’s crush was so well known by everyone and he had never admitted it or even considered it in any way.

“Izzy,” Jace warned.

“Make him happy?” Izzy repeated. “Stop being so reckless and also stop believing anything psychopathic maniacs says who lie for a living.”

Jace sighed in frustration at her teasing tone but also heard her hidden concern and scolding; in hindsight believing a word Valentine had said was beyond stupid and even more stupid to have followed him to his ship when they could easily have defeated him and his men then and there. He had been so eager for family and a home he hadn’t realized he already had all of that here, with Alec.

“Izzy, I mean it,” Jace insisted. “I want to make him happy.”

Izzy sobered and gave Jace a searching look before she asked with a hint of concern, “Are you serious?”

Jace nodded and Izzy considered his question for a few moments.

“Do you return his affections?” Izzy asked with the directness Jace had come to expect from her.

“Yes,” Jace replied at once, not having a moment of doubt.

“In _that_ way?” Izzy insisted, emphasizing the middle word to make it clear what she meant.

Jace took no offence to the question. He was known as a ladies man and the reputation was well earned. However, he had long known that for him sex and love were different. When he loved someone, he loved them. When he had realized he truly loved Alec he had been turned on by his body too even though he had never before desired a man sexually. He had loved very few people in his life, in fact of the few he did love Alec had always stood above them all.

Jace nodded as he replied gravely, “Yes.”

Jace tensed, fearing she may be against a relationship between her brother and him, but he quickly realized he didn’t need to worry. A wide grin spread over Izzy’s lips and her eyes shore with joy.

“Congrats!” Izzy said joyfully, giving him a hug with her arms around his neck.

“Thank you. It means a lot to have your support,” Jace admitted with a soft look, holding her close for a moment.

“Of course. I love you both and just want you to be happy,” Izzy assured him as she drew back again. She paused before she added worried, “The whole parabatai thing…”

Jace shook his head and held up a hand, silencing her.

“I had my grandmother look into it. There is no curse. It is made up to discourage same sex couplings as most parabatai are same sex,” Jace explained.

Izzy drew a relieved breath as she nodded thoughtfully and replied, “Yes, that does sound much more likely than a curse. The Clave has always rewritten history as they want and are fiercely homophobic.”

Jace nodded, having thought the same thing, “True.”

Izzy smiled encouraging at him before she asked with mild confusion, “So, why are you here with me then and not with him? It is clearly not a secret to either of us that Alec has been worshipping the ground you walk on since he first saw you.”

Jace couldn’t help but beam proudly at her words. Imagine that; him having found someone who loved him that much, that strongly, after being told by Valentine growing up that love destroys. He was one lucky son of a bitch and he was going to make damn sure Alec knew just how much he treasured the gift his love was.

“I want to tell him in a special way. He deserves that,” Jace said with a fond look.

Izzy smiled back as she replied, “He does. He has waited long enough.”

Jace nodded in agreement; Alec had indeed waited years for him. He deserved this done right.

“So, what does he like?” Jace insisted.

Izzy was thoughtful for a moment before her face lit up as an idea came to her.

“He has been talking about needing a new training bow,” Izzy suggested.

“A bow?” Jace repeated. Then he smiled widely, “Perfect! I will do that!”

Jace knew just how to get a perfect bow. This was going to be great!

* * *

Jace had found the best bow imaginable. Handmade by Seelies from special wood from their forests and he had himself carved runes into it that he painted guld. This gift would surely convince Alec he loved him like he loved him.

Jace knocked on the door to Alec’s room at the Institute, now more than ever loving the fact they as parabatai had been able to get rooms next to each other. As soon as Jace heard Alec give permission, he entered, hiding the bow as well as he could behind his back.

“Alec,” Jace said, unable to stop smiling, almost bouncy with excitement.

Alec had been reading on his bed and was sitting up, leaning against the headboard. He had tensed, ready to get off the bed and greet his guest formally when he had allowed entrance. When he saw it was Jace he relaxed and smiled at once, staying where he was.

After Jace had realized he truly and deeply loved Alec he had realized how handsome he looked, how his mere presence made Alec’s eyes shine with joy, how his smallest touch made Alec relax. In turn Jace found that he now smiled whenever he saw the raven-haired boy whom Jace realized was his whole world. However, Alec seemed determined to worship Jace and think nothing of himself, instead of seeing what Jace saw in him.

“Hi Jace,” Alec greeted warmly.

“You busy?” Jace asked as he closed the door and walked to stand by the end of the bed.

Jace couldn’t help but have to fight a growing desire. Seeing Alec laying on his back on a bed…it was the beginning of many a fantasy he had recently.

“No, it’s fine. What can I help you with?” Alec asked with a puzzled look.

“I just….well,” Jace got out, suddenly feeling nervous and shy even though he knew Alec loved him and as such would love anything he gave him.

“You ok?” Alec asked worried.

Jace quickly did a dismissive handwave, sensing Alec’s concern in the bond and feeling deeply warmed by it.

“Yes, yes,” Jace quickly assured him.

“Good,” Alec said, relieved.

Before he lost his courage Jace showed Alec the bow, enjoying the admiration and fascination in his gaze as soon as Alec saw it.

“This is for you,” Jace said softly, putting the bow into Alec’s hands.

Alec beamed happily, caressing the bow, noticing the golden runes carved into it and touching them carefully with a finger.

“A new bow?” Alec marveled. He smiled widely at Jace, getting misty-eyed.

“Yes,” Jace said with a smile, sitting on the bedside.

“Thank you,” Alec said emotionally, drawing Jace into a warm embrace.

Jace held him close, enjoying Alec’s nearness, hearing his heartbeat next to his own.

“You like it?” Jace asked eagerly when they drew apart.

Alec nodded excitedly, enthusiastically, “I love it. It’s perfect.”

Jace grinned, no, he beamed like a sun, filled with pride and joy at having given Alec this.

“Good.”

For a moment, their eyes met and held, a look filled with unspoken love and affection. Then, just as Jace was about to say it, say those words, Alec looked down with a faint blush, fighting to hide his emotions as he had done his whole life.

“Now that you are here, I would like your thoughts on a pattern I see regarding the demon attack that happened downtown earlier today,” Alec said, stammering a bit due to his nervousness and worry that his true feelings should be revealed.

Jace realized Alec truly couldn’t believe he loved him like that. He was still afraid, still hiding. The moment had passed. He hadn’t acted fast enough; he hadn’t showed Alec beyond a shadow of a doubt he loved him completely and fully. He had to find another way.

“Oh. OK,” Jace agreed, smiling softly as he gave Alec’s nearest hand a small squeeze, smiling even wider when Alec returned his touch.

Ok so this idea hadn’t worked. Jace had to find another way to show Alec he loved him. He needed another’s advice….

* * *

He didn’t even have to consider whom to ask for advice next. The following day Clary called him out after watching him and Alec together, telling him she had always known Alec was gay and into Jace, but this was the first time she had seen he was into Alec too. She had quickly assured Jace she was fine with it as she had realized her true love was Simon, the boy who had loved her for years from afar, always loyal and patient. They both understood their love stories matched each other remarkably well. With that in mind Jace asked for Clary’s advice on how to tell Alec he loved him. She had told him that in the Mundane world you never went wrong with flowers and chocolates. Jace had never heard of that or seen that before as romance wasn’t really something that was a treasured quality in a warrior culture like Idris. But maybe that was why it would work perfectly.

So, following this new idea Jace had bought flowers and a box of chocolates from a Mundane shop Clary had recommended. He had left the flowers and the box on Alec’s desk in his office, waiting for his reaction as Clary had advised. However, in hindsight he probably shouldn’t have taken dating advice from someone who Alec had actively resented when he had first met her, not only as competition to Jace but also because he had found her too innocent and too Mundane to get by in the Shadow World.

Jace had waited on pins and needles for hours to hear Alec’s reaction to his surprise. His waiting was over when Alec had entered his office, a confused look on his face.

“Jace, do you know who left flowers and chocolates on my desk?” Alec asked, sounding truly puzzled.

“Well…me,” Jace admitted, giving him a searching look to see his reaction.

“Why?” Alec asked, looking truly perplexed now.

Jace could see this approach clearly hadn’t worked. Alec just seemed confused by it. He had to find another way.

“I wanted to say I appreciate you,” Jace admitted, giving Alec a soft smile.

“Oh. Ok. Hmm…Thanks,” Alec said, instantly smiling back even if he still looked very weirded out by Jace’s choice of saying that to him.

“I appreciate you too,” Alec assured him as he came over and gave Jace a big hug that Jace eagerly returned.

So this hadn’t worked out as Jace had hoped either, but he was determined to find another way to finally admit to his feelings in a manner that was just perfect for Alec. But what to do?

* * *

Jace’s next two attempts didn’t fare much better. From Simon he was advised to take Alec to a fancy Mundane restaurant which was nice but such an unusual experience for them both that none of them felt comfortable there. Then from Magnus he got the advice to take Alec to an exotic location and try unique alcohol and food there. However, as he had no money to travel and couldn’t portal, there was little point in the suggestion. Besides, Jace knew from the restaurant visit that tasting different Mundane foods and alcohol didn’t seem to be something Alec was all that into. So, Jace decided this time to not even try that advice.

But then what else could he do? The more he thought about it the more Jace realized that Alec had fallen in love with him for him. Because he was Jace. Because he didn’t hesitate to claim what was his. Alec had fallen in love with him because he was everything Alec wasn’t. Where Alec was shy and hesitant and doubted himself, Jace was confident and self-assured in public. He had his own demons to fight, alone, in private, but Alec had always understood that and been there for him, an ever-present support.

Realizing he loved Alec had also made Jace understand Alec better. He wasn’t boring for not wanting to party like some of the young Nephilim whispered. He wasn’t weak for caring for equality and justice for everyone in the Shadow World, also the demon-blooded, like the purists in Idris claimed and he most certainly wasn’t a coward when he followed the rules but was just being careful and strategic. Every day of Alec’s life he had been told he wasn’t good enough and despite his continued focus to excel and do well, he rarely got any praise or attention from his parents. In some ways Jace felt he may have gotten a better deal despite his own very painful upbringing. Valentine had been a cold and demanding parent, but he hadn’t done what Maryse continued to do even now, as a grown man, to Alec and put him down constantly. As soon as Jace had come to live with the Lightwoods when he had been nine years old, he had broken free from Valentine’s abuse by ensuring he never followed anyone but himself when push came to shove. Alec, on the other hand, needed praise and directions to feel safe after living every day with people who never appreciated him and would give contradictory demands and cruel and sudden punishments when he for obvious reasons failed. All of this had culminated with Alec even hurting himself when he failed, unable to go on without the release he found in doing so.

The more Jace thought about it the more it became clear to him what he had to do. He had to just be himself and show Alec just how much he wanted him and how loved he was. He needed to do this his way, the Jace way, and give Alec the security and safety he needed

Decision made, Jace had decided to claim what was his once and for all. In hindsight Jace realized Alec had always been his but he had just been too blind to notice.

“Jace,” Alec said with a smile when Jace entered his office late that afternoon, closing the door behind him.

“Alec,” Jace replied, barely withheld emotions dancing over his face.

With his mind made up Jace found it hard to think about anything else than making Alec his. Now that he was seeing Alec, he kept thinking how his lips might taste, how it would feel like to kiss him…how Alec’s moans of desire would sound.

“Everything ok?” Alec asked, feeling his nervousness in the bond.

Alec rose and walked over to Jace, meeting him halfway.

“I have been trying for weeks now to tell you something. Something important,” Jace told him, giving Alec a small smile, unable to quite hide his excitement but also his unavoidable nervousness.

He knew Alec loved him and would never reject him and yet still he had to fight that internal voice, his father’s voice, no Valentine’s voice, that said to love was to destroy. However, meeting Alec, Jace now knew that was a lie like everything Valentine had ever said. Feeling Alec’s love in the bond and seeing it reflected in his eyes made it easy for Jace to go on, all hints of his past fading in the light that was Alec’s love for him.

“Ok,” Alec said slowly, a puzzled expression on his face.

“I wanted it to be special,” Jace insisted.

Alec nodded, frowning, but still said in an encouraging voice, “Ok.”

“I just….What I mean is…” Jace started nervously. He then ran a hand through his hair as he gave up and proclaimed, “Screw it!”

Before Alec had time to think Jace had walked into his personal space, making Alec take a few steps back till he was back against the nearest wall. Jace saw the look of confusion and arousal in Alec’s eyes as he leaned against him and put a hand on either side of Alec’s face. Jace crashed their lips together, claiming Alec’s lips like he had dreamed of doing for a few weeks now. Alec moaned and easily melted into the kiss, giving Jace’s tongue access as he closed his eyes. Jace felt Alec’s passion in the bond and his own desire and love increased.

After what felt like a lifetime Jace released Alec’s face and his lips, pulling a bit back but staying close, putting one hand against the wall next to Alec’s head.

The kiss left Alec breathless and dazed, his lips swollen and red, a dreamy look on his face. When Alec opened his eyes, he saw Jace give him a smug grin, clearly soaking up Alec’s reactions.

“Oh. Wow,” Alec got out, grinning silly, almost drunkenly.

Jace grinned back, finding Alec’s joy and amazement contagious and flattering, “Yeah.”

“Are you saying….” Alec asked hopefully.

Jace nodded as he finally said what he had wanted to say all along, “I am saying I love you.”

Alec grinned joyfully, “You do?”

Alec’s joy was crashing over Jace in the bond, making his own joy more than double. Jace laughed and nodded.

He gave Alec a tender look as he stroked his chin before he confirmed in a strong and sure voice, knowing how Alec needed the reassurance, “I do.”

Alec beamed happily but then a shadow of doubt fell over his face.

“Love _love_?” Alec asked hesitantly.

“Yep. Love _love_ ,” Jace confirmed, still smiling like an idiot.

At first Alec looked so happy but then his face fell, making Jace give him a worried look.

“But the curse…” Alec asked worried.

“Doesn’t exist,” Jace interrupted strongly, not wanting Alec to worry for a second if he didn’t have to. “We are all clear.”

Alec relaxed at hearing that.

“Oh. That’s…” Alec began, giving him a look filled with awe and love.

“Amazing?” Jace suggested when he saw Alec was so head over heels overhearing his dream was coming true, he couldn’t find the right word.

“Very,” Alec admitted, nodding. He gave Jace a searching look as he suddenly realized, “Wait, was that why you have been acting so strangely?”

Jace nodded as he admitted a bit sheepishly, “Yes.”

“You thought I would like all of that,” Alec realized.

“Actually, it was advice from Izzy, Clary, Simon and Magnus,” Jace explained. “Though I didn’t do Magnus’ idea as it was to travel to exotic places and try different foods and drinks. I figured it wasn’t something that would say love declaration to you.”

There was a hint of doubt in Jace’s voice now, well aware that Magnus had magic and a small fortune and could indeed have shown Alec the world and taken him everywhere. However, his fear was short-lived as Alec nodded in agreement to his words, sending love and reassurance through the bond.

Alec laughed fondly, “True.”

“But this here, now…that was all me,” Jace told him with a smile.

“I liked this one best of all,” Alec assured him, giving his cheek a hesitant but tender touch.

Jace smiled and nodded in agreement, “Me too.”

Alec bit his lower lip as he blushed and looked down for a moment. The look of innocence and sin in one written all over Alec’s face was so endearing Jace had to fight not to give into a fantasy he had had for a few days now of fucking Alec against the wall. But he wanted his first time with Alec to be about him. They had a lifetime now, together, for doing other things. He wanted the here and now to be about Alec, after he had spent his whole life since meeting him making everything about Jace.

“Maybe you should show me more of your way,” Alec suggested, sounding eager yet shy at the same time in a way only Alec could do.

“I plan to,” Jace promised, giving Alec a heated look before stealing a quick kiss. When their lips parted Jace added seriously, “First though tell me directly why you love my way, so I am sure I don’t misunderstand you.”

Alec was thoughtful for a moment, trying to find the right words.

“I…I felt truly desired. Wanted,” Alec admitted, blushing as he said it but his eyes shone with joy at the feelings he was having.

Jace grinned, happy to hear he had been right.

“Because I showed you how much I want you?” Jace asked, pressing a bit closer to Alec, and enjoying seeing how his eyes darkened with desire.

Playing a hunch Jace used his free hand to take Alec’s nearest wrist and while holding his gaze Jace kissed the palm, making Alec give a small needy moan. Then Jace pinned Alec’s wrist to the wall next to his head, the grip strong, guiding, but not painful. Just secure enough that it would leave a faint mark that would let Alec know without a doubt how much Jace wanted him. Jace saw Alec’s eyes cloud with desire and felt his own increase in the process. He leaned close to Alec, his lips near his ear.

“You like that I have you up against the wall like this?” Jace asked in a voice hoarse with desire before he drew back so he could look at Alec to see his reaction.

Alec blushed as he nodded, “Yes. Your Angel-blood…knowing that strength, feeling it in such a firm but…” Alec searched for the right word, “Considerate way…”

“You like that?” Jace finished for him, having felt Alec’s arousal and desire in the bond as well as in his body’s reactions.

Alec nodded as he admitted quietly, “Yes. I feel safe. Wanted.”

Jace saw the hint of doubt in Alec’s eyes and quickly assured him, “You are all of that and more when you are with me.”

Alec relaxed but Jace could feel a hint of nervousness remaining in the bond so he quickly added, his tone now softer, “I love I can make you feel that. I love feeling you like this against me.”

Alec’s face clouded with desire and they both moved their heads at the same time, their lips meeting in a passionate and sloppy kiss that had both of them sporting erections.

For a brief moment Jace was tempted to just give into his desire right here, but he wanted something special. He pulled away from Alec and the wall, seeing the hint of disappointment and a slight note of fear in Alec’s eyes as he did so. However, as soon as he closed his hand around Alec’s right wrist the heat and joy returned to Alec’s face.

“Come with me,” Jace said unnecessarily as he walked towards the door to the office as Alec was eagerly following along, not needing Jace’s touch to do so but clearly enjoying it.

“Jace! It’s not even 16 hundred hours!” Alec protested when they left his office, but he made no move to stop or slow down, in fact Jace could feel his rising arousal and desire in the bond.

“Andrew can cover for you,” Jace insisted, not even pausing in his quick pace, knowing Alec would keep up.

He could feel Alec’s excitement and slight nervousness in the bond at knowing and feeling how much Jace wanted him. Jace couldn’t even begin to imagine how that might be like; to have loved and desired someone for years and then after all that agonizing, hiding, pining, and doubting realizing you just might get it.

“I will have to let him know,” Alec reminded him but there was only joy and eagerness in his tone.

“I already did that for you,” Jace told him, turning to look at him while they walked, winking at him.

Alec blushed and smiled before he rolled his eyes at him.

“So sure your way would work on me?” Alec teased in a warm tone.

“You fell in love with my way and I realized that was why my way would always work,” Jace remarked insightfully with no small amount of joy and pride.

Alec’s expression softened as he replied, “That’s true.”

“Besides, we have waited long enough. You’re mine now,” Jace insisted, his voice filled with love and passion, possession and desire.

“I like the sound of that,” Alec admitted hoarsely in a voice filled with so much need and affection it made Jace’s heart flutter in response.

They made their way from Alec’s office to Jace’s room in record time. No one even dared to consider looking disapprovingly at them when they noticed Jace’s strong grip on Alec’s wrist; not quite holding hands but close enough that it would normally have drawn attention. However, Jace made sure to cast anyone they passed warning glances; a pure Angel-blooded Herondale wasn’t someone any Nephilim dared to cross.

As soon as the door to Jace’s room was shut and he had applied locking and silencing runes to it he maneuvered Alec up against the nearest wall of his room with one hand on his hip and the other on his side. There was a hunger and a need between them, in the bond, so strong it was almost tangible.

Alec licked dry lips and Jace felt his cock harden at the sinful image. He wondered if Alec knew just how erotic that gesture was; that tongue of his…unable to stop himself Jace took Alec’s face in his hands once more and kissed him roughly, possessively, swallowing the needy and eager moans Alec was making. Unsure where to move his hands Alec put them on Jace’s hips, melting into the kiss, eagerly and easily yielding to his touch.

“You taste amazing,” Jace admitted with a heated look when he finally drew back for breath.

“You really think so?” Alec asked a bit hesitantly.

“Yes,” Jace confirmed without pause. His eyes shone golden as he added seductively while stroking Alec’s face and neck, “However, I want to do so much more than kiss you.”

“Like what?” Alec got out, sounding out of breath, his eyes reflecting his desire and eagerness to hear precisely how much Jace wanted him.

Jace took a finger and ran it across Alec’s lips, making Alec close his eyes for a moment in pleasure.

“I want to feel those sinful lips of yours around my cock till I come down your throat,” Jace said lustfully.

Alec _did_ moan at that the image those words gave him.

“Would you like that, Alec?” Jace asked, mostly because he wanted to hear him say it.

Alec’s desire had sent waves through their bond and Jace was so close to his body he could feel Alec’s erection had gotten even harder.

Alec nodded, his eyes filled with desire.

Only after struggling for a moment to get his brain working again did Alec manage to reply, “Yes.”

Jace felt almost euphoric at hearing that, hearing Alec confirm how much he wanted him. He had known it, felt it in the bond but hearing it spoken out loud….Why had he waited so long for this? Alec had literally been there from the start, been his from the start. Well, it was about time he made up for the wasted opportunities.

Jace’s touch on Alec’s chin grew stronger but still tender as he admitted in a heated voice, “After that I want to be inside of you. I have dreamt of that every night for days now. I can’t wait to see how reality compares to my fantasies.”

Alec lowered his eyes for a moment as he mumbled under his breath, “You may be disappointed.”

Jace tipped Alec’s face up so they were eye to eye as he said strongly with absolute certainty, “I never could.”

Alec bit his lower lip anxiously.

“I have…I have never…” Alec stammered nervously.

“You’re a virgin?” Jace asked surprised but couldn’t help but sound pleased. Since he had realized he loved Alec he had been hitting himself for missing the chance to be Alec’s first, having assumed he and Magnus had had sex.

Alec blushed a deep red as he admitted, “Yes.”

Jace’ moved his hand from Alec’s chin to cup his cheek tenderly, lovingly.

“Didn’t you and Magnus…”

Alec shook his head, making Jace fall silent. The joy at the news was so strong Jace couldn’t contain it and Alec could feel it in the bond, making him settle down a bit.

“No. Everything happened so fast. We only ever kissed that one time as well, there at the wedding with Lydia,” Alec admitted, sounding both guilty and proud at having done that.

Jace knew Lydia was now becoming a close friend to Alec. However, Alec still felt guilty for having done that to her at the wedding, even if she had said it was ok. Though that was Alec, _his_ Alec; always trying to please everyone and sometimes blowing up the very ground he was standing on when he realized he had gotten contradictory desires, orders or needs. A thing Alec had always had problems dealing with was accepting a fact Jace had long known to be true; you can’t please everyone and living for someone other than yourself will just make you miserable. Well, now Alec had him and Jace would put Alec first from now on even if Alec insisted on putting him – and basically everyone else – before himself. Getting Alec to care about Alec was going to be Jace’s greatest challenge of his life, but he was always up for a challenge. He never failed and he would spend the rest of his life ensuring he would not fail now either.

“I am happy to be your first, Alec. Honored in fact,” Jace told him, giving him a smile filled with love, affection and possessiveness.

“Really?” Alec asked, grinning hopefully, widely, because he could feel Jace’s desire and joy in the bond.

Jace stole a quick kiss, grinning back and nodding before he replied, “Really.”

Jace could feel in the bond that Alec was still unsure, still worried if Jace truly did want him sexually. Well, he was just going to have to prove how much he desired him.

Jace stroked Alec’s cheek and neck, rubbing over the pulse point on his neck with his thumb as he admitted in voice filled with desire and passion, “If it was up to me, we would spend the rest of the week in bed with me just pumping one orgasm after the other out of you.”

Alec almost forgot to breathe at hearing that, his desire at the words sending waves the size of a tsunami through the bond. He blushed a deep red and for a moment fought to maintain eye contact which Jace just found endearing. He had never been with a virgin before nor with someone he truly loved. He was finding both an incredible turn-on; knowing that Alec was his in all ways. What clearer declaration of love could he possibly ask for than that?

“That’s…wow,” Alec managed to get out. He paused before he had admitted shyly, “The rumor is that you naturally have…” He hesitated, blushing again as he searched for the right words before he went on, “Amazing stamina.”

Jace grinned at hearing that. He knew the rumors even though frankly for a lot of the girls at the Institute it wasn’t really a rumor as he had been with most of them.

Jace looked seductively at Alec as he purred, “I do. Knowing now I have pure Angel-blood, my guess is that it is due to that.”

“Oh,” Alec managed to say. He hesitated, fiddling a bit, unsure what to say.

“You can say anything. There is no wrong thing when it comes to sex if both people are in to it,” Jace assured him.

Alec blushed even more before he finally replied in so low a voice Jace barely heard him, “I don’t normally…you know…when I’m alone and think of you…last long.”

Jace shook his head before giving Alec a heated kiss that left Alec dazed and in no doubt Jace desired him.

“Sex is not an endurance test but if you want, and I do mean you as I have no requirements on that, wish then we can always consider playing around with runes,” Jace told him as he drew back from the kiss, touching Alec’s slightly kiss-swollen lips with a finger.

Jace was only half-joking. Knowing how Maryse had raised Alec and the coldness from Robert Alec would precisely worry about getting sex ‘right’.

“Hm,” Alec managed to say, clearly not really knowing what Jace meant by that.

“Alec, I don’t care how long you last. In fact, I find it rather flattering I can make you lose control like that. Making you come over and over again till you can’t anymore, and you fall asleep in my arms sounds like a wonderful night to me,” Jace clarified to ensure Alec was in no doubt he had no expectations whatsoever about that, giving Alec a sexy grin with affection shining in his eyes.

“But don’t you…” Alec got out, fighting to speak despite his embarrassment.

Jace guessed Alec’s worry. He knew Alec always worried about him and his feelings and happiness, so he was sure he was doing that now too.

He stroked Alec’s cheek tenderly as he added with seduction pouring from his eyes, “And don’t worry. I am sure just being inside of you and feeling you come will make me come as well.”

Alec’s eyes shone with lust and love as he got out, “I like the sound of that.”

Jace felt his words had calmed some of Alec’s fears but he was sure doing was a lot better than saying. So, he decided the best way to ensure Alec was not in doubt he was desired was to show him.

“In that case…want to fulfill that first fantasy of mine?” Jace asked passionately, cupping his face with both hands, giving him a look filled with desire.

“Which part?” Alec got out, his voice already hoarse with anticipation and need, their lust feeding off each other in the bond.

“The one where you are on your knees with my cock in your mouth,” Jace suggested in a voice that did nothing to hide his desire and passion.

Alec moaned wantonly at that image and before Jace even had time to think Alec was on his knees before Jace, looking up at him with a shy but eager look.

“You were always so good at following orders,” Jace praised, stroking Alec’s hair, grounding him with his touch. His expression softened as he added seriously, “You can say no. It was a fantasy, not an order. You know that, right?”

Alec nodded, making the movement small to ensure Jace’s hand stayed on him.

“I do but I want this. I have dreamed of doing this for years,” Alec got out in a voice hoarse with passion and desire.

Jace couldn’t help but moan out loud at that. To know he had been Alec’s fantasy for years…it was mind-blowing to know he was that desired, loved, wanted. It was everything he had ever dreamed of in a partner, but thought he would never have.

Alec moved closer and put his hands on Jace’s hips, looking up at him with an eager expression on his face.

“You have no idea how amazing you look right now,” Jace told him, feeling his pants getting way too tight at the sight of the older boy on his knees before him, so eager, so patient.

Alec licked dry lips, the movement making Jace’s desire flare even higher.

“Can I…” Alec asked as he reached for Jace’s fly, looking up at him for permission.

Jace nodded, fighting to hold back and not go faster than Alec was ready for even though Jace didn’t think he had ever been this turned on in his life.

“Go ahead. Do whatever you feel like,” Jace encouraged, his touch in Alec’s hair more a guide than a command.

Alec wasted no time getting Jace’s cock freed from its trappings. Jace had gotten many blowjobs in his life, from some of the most experienced immortal women in the Shadow World. Yet nothing compared to the worship Alec was giving his cock. The soft strokes, the small kitten licks, the admiring stare, and the passion in the bond. It was incredible beyond words.

“Hmm,” Alec mumbled in pleasure when he took Jace’s cock fully into his mouth for the first time, half-closing his eyes as he savored the taste and feel.

Jace couldn’t help but use his grip on Alec’s hair to give a small thrust into Alec’s mouth, enjoying how eagerly and instinctively Alec was opening up for him and swallowing him down.

“Fuck, that’s great, Alec,” Jace sighed, fighting to keep his thrusts shallow.

Jace kept a firm hand in Alec’s hair to let him know he was desired and doing well.

Jace’s encouraged praise and moans of pleasure made Alec bold and he was soon eagerly taking Jace’s whole cock, moving up and down faster and faster, adding a hand to fondle his balls. Jace would have happily stayed like this forever, Alec’s lips around his cock, but he was sure Alec’s jaw had to be sore by now and his throat starting to ache. He was just about to ask Alec if he wanted to stop when Alec pulled off his cock and looked up at him with a sinful expression, drool at the corners of his mouth, his lips red. He looked more handsome, sexier, than Jace had ever seen him.

“I want to taste you,” Alec rasped, his voice hoarse and weak from the blowjob but his eyes held only lust and adoration as he looked up at him.

Jace’s pure Angel-blood meant he could easily have kept holding back but he didn’t want to. He wanted to give Alec everything _he_ wanted but more than that; he wanted that too. He wanted to mark Alec as his in this most primal way. He wanted to be connected to Alec in this way. This had been Alec’s fantasy, but it had also been Jace’s.

Jace was a bit unsure how Alec wanted to taste but was pleased when Alec showed him. A bit shyly, blushing even with Jace’s cock back in his mouth, Alec took a hand and laid it over Jace’s in his hair, indicating he wanted Jace to hold firmer and take what he wanted. Taking the hint Jace tightened his grip in Alec’s hair and used it to pump in and out of Alec’s mouth, making sure to not go faster, deeper, or harder than Alec could follow, carefully watching his reactions through the bond and in his expressions. The pure bliss on Alec’s face and the lust in the bond was enough to quickly push Jace towards the edge.

“Yes!” Jace screamed as he came explosively down Alec’s throat.

Alec fought to control his gag reflex but eagerly managed to swallow it all, making Jace tighten his hand in Alec’s hair and moan at the sight. The slight pull had Alec’s passion skyrocket once more.

After he had licked Jace clean Alec sat back on his heels with a satisfied expression on his face, giving Jace a slightly questioning look. Jace felt the endorphins making him feel high and floaty and his heart swelled with love and affection, feeling a need to have Alec close to him in all ways.

“Come here, babe,” Jace said softly, helping Alec back to his feet and into his arms.

“Was it…ok?” Alec asked hopefully, holding Jace close and for a moment hiding his face in the curve of Jace’s neck as best as he could given their height difference even though it meant bending a bit.

Jace smiled and drew soothing circles on Alec’s neck, feeling him relax against him. In public Alec was always so stoic or at least tried to be, but in private he had always been eager for touch and snuggles, likely because he had never gotten it. For Jace touching for love was a new thing. He had held many women after sex, but it hadn’t been what holding Alec had always been; this connection. This security.

“It was great,” Jace promised, a soft look on his face as he gently pulled Alec a bit back so they could look at each other and Alec could read the love and sincerity on his face.

When Alec was smiling happily at him Jace claimed his lips in a tender but possessive kiss.

“It was,” Alec admitted blissfully, giving Jace’s cheek a loving touch, the movement still a bit hesitant and new to him but ever so eager and warm.

“Let’s move this to the bed,” Jace suggested, nodding towards it as he moved back from Alec.

Jace took Alec’s hand in his, this time with a hint of hesitation as he did so, having never held hands with a man before and he had only with Alec till now held around his wrist. Jace’s hesitation turned to pure joy when Alec eagerly and happily closed his hand around his. They shared a smile filled with love at being able to share this touch; a touch meant for lovers.

Jace started to walk towards the bed and with eyes dark with desire Alec eagerly followed him. Jace stopped by the foot of the bed and reluctantly let go of Alec’s hand, but only after pulling him close and kissing him once more. Alec watched with hungry eyes as Jace quickly undressed. With a sexy wink at Alec, he pulled out a small packet of lube from his pants pocket and threw it at the end of the bed. Alec blushed a bit, but his erection only grew at Jace’s gesture and even more at seeing Jace fully naked for the first time in his life.

“You look…amazing,” Alec admitted when Jace gave him a questioning look.

Jace winked at him in reply, very much aware of the affect he had on Alec and most other people with a pulse to be honest.

“Thank you,” Jace said pleased, grinning. He waved an eager hand at Alec as he added, “Your turn.”

Alec keenly pulled off his shirt, encouraged by Jace’s heated gaze. He unbuttoned his pants and was about to pull them down when suddenly he hesitated. He bit his lower lip nervously.

“I…” Alec started, giving Jace an uncertain look.

Jace was by his side at once, drawing a soothing hand up and down Alec’s arm as he assured him, “We can wait.”

Alec hesitated, clearly fighting what to do.

“It’s not that. I want this. I want you. but I…I have scars you haven’t seen before,” Alec admitted in a low voice, his eyes on the ground, his cheeks red with shame.

“I don’t mind,” Jace assured him in a warm and tender voice.

“It’s not battle scars,” Alec stammered, finally daring to look up at him.

When Alec saw only acceptance and love in Jace’s face he almost started to cry in relief.

“Alec,” Jace said softly, tenderly, stroking his cheek lovingly, “I know you tend to hurt yourself when you feel you fail or to deal with the pain inside. I never have and never would think less of you for that. I do feel sad and worried for the pain you must be in to do it, but I never will and never could think poorly of you for struggling.”

Alec looked away again for a moment and blushed even more as he mumbled, “You wouldn’t do it.”

“No but then I am reckless and other shit,” Jace replied with a shrug, knowing he had his demons as well as Alec did.

So what if they were a bit bent, both of them? Their odd shapes fitted together, and no one could ever tell him otherwise.

“You don’t find it…weak?” Alec asked hesitantly, hopefully.

Jace shook his head, “No. Never. You are one of the strongest people I know.”

Alec beamed at hearing that but still had to ask, “Are you sure?”

“I am,” Jace confirmed strongly. He moved his hand back to Alec’s arm as he added in an understanding tone, “But we can also wait with doing more tonight.”

“No. I want to,” Alec said firmly, shaking his head.

Jace smiled encouragingly and gave Alec a tender kiss before he stepped a bit back to give him space. Alec started to undress again, blushing, and keeping his eyes lowered. When he was naked, he stood uneasily, fighting not to cover himself, his hands going towards his still semihard erection before falling along his sides.

Jace knew Alec’s body almost as well as his own. There was only one part of Alec he had never seen before; Alec’s cock and crotch area, including his upper inner thighs. While Jace’s attention was most definitely drawn to Alec’s cock, the sight making his own erection grow, then he quickly saw what Alec was fighting not to hide from him.

“Is it the marks on your inner thighs?” Jace guessed in a soft tone, waving a hand towards that area of his body.

On Alec’s inner thighs were multiple layers of thin white lines, overlying each other, indicating years and years of cuts had been applied. The freshest cuts seemed weeks ago, healed but still standing out.

Alec sank and nodded wordlessly.

“There is _nothing_ ugly about you, Alec,” Jace swore strongly as he stepped back into Alec’s personal space, touching his cheek lovingly.

“Really?” Alec asked in a small voice.

“Really,” Jace confirmed softly.

Alec drew a relieved breath at hearing that.

“However, in the future I hope you will come to me so I can help you find a better outlet when you hurt,” Jace asked.

“I will try,” Alec promised after giving it serious thought for a few moments.

Jace nodded in understanding, “That’s all I ask.”

He couldn’t expect Alec to change a lifetime of how he dealt with pain, with hurt, with pressure, his mother’s continued push and pull and his father’s cold indifference, but he would from now on work hard on being there and doing what he could.

“So…” Alec said, nervously, looking from Jace to the bed.

Seeing his uneasiness Jace embraced him and kissed him passionately, making all of Alec’s worries fade. Alec eagerly melted into his embrace, giving everything he had to Jace as he always had done. They both moaned as they felt their growing erections touch and rub against each other, making their passion flare to life.

When Jace pulled back Alec had to struggle to open his eyes and look at him, heat and passion shining in his eyes.

“Go lie on the bed, love,” Jace purred, nodding to the bed.

Alec beamed at the nickname; love. He was still glowing, his nervousness forgotten in the light of Jace’s love when he got on the bed and laid on his back.

“Ok?” Alec asked as he looked down at him.

Jace nodded, smiling reassuringly as he crawled onto the bed and covered Alec’s body with his own, marking Alec’s body as he went with hickeys and kisses, making Alec sigh in pleasure. When Jace reached Alec’s neck he sucked more marks into his skin, marveling at seeing his claim appear. Alec turned his face and exposed his neck, eager for more marks, making both of them moan; Jace when he started to add a new mark at seeing Alec’s eagerness to be his and Alec at seeing Jace’s desire to make him his. When Jace started to rub against Alec their erections brushed against each other, making both of them have to fight to contain a growl of desire.

“You’re hard again,” Alec marveled with surprise, awe, and desire in his tone when Jace pulled back for a moment to look at Alec.

“Pure Angel-blood,” Jace smirked as he moved exactly right for both of them to moan once more as their cocks rubbed against each other again.

“Jace, I dreamed of this for _so_ long. I won’t last if you don’t stop,” Alec warned when Jace kept moving his hips just right to create the friction Alec craved, his cock leaking precome.

“Don’t hold back. Come for me,” Jace whispered seductively into Alec’s ear, nibbling at his earlobe as he rolled his hips again, feeling Alec’s desire flare in the bond.

With just a few more thrusts Alec could no longer hold back. Having Jace like this and being with another person for the first time in his life, being with the _only_ person in his life he had ever wanted to be with…it was all too much.

“Fuck!” Alec cried as he came explosively between their bellies.

Jace stilled his movements and moved off Alec, laying on his side as he stroked Alec’s cheek, neck and chest lovingly.

Alec fought to control his breathing and return to reality, still feeling the high of his orgasm.

“You look amazing when you come,” Jace told him with a soft smile.

Alec smiled shyly.

“You are such a romantic in bed. I never figured that,” Alec admitted, stroking Jace’s jawline with his fingers.

Jace caught his hand and kissed it.

“Only ever with you,” Jace swore, his voice husky and emotional.

Jace drew Alec into a warm hug as best as he could in their positions, kissing the top of Alec’s head. For a few moments they just laid like that, Alec laying his hands on top of Jace’s over his chest, both of them enjoying the closeness.

Alec could feel Jace’s erection pocking his side but Jace seemed completely fine with just holding him like this. However, as Alec’s post-orgasmic haze started to fade his desire to finally be Jace’s, to feel him completely, was overwhelming. He turned so he could look at Jace.

“I want you inside me,” Alec admitted, only a small hint of fear of rejection in his voice now after what they had done.

“I want that too,” Jace assured him, giving him a warm kiss, and sending feelings of love and desire through the bond.

Alec watched with huge eyes filled with a mixture of excitement and desire as Jace moved to sit between his legs. Alec’s cock was slowly trying to reawaken when Alec saw Jace tear the packet of lube with his teeth and pour some on his right hand. Jace looked at Alec, giving him a soft smile as he drew circles on one of his thighs with one hand while slowly starting to touch his entrance with his other lubed hand.

Being touched there was unfamiliar and weird at first but when Jace kissed one of Alec’s scars on his inner thigh he felt so overwhelmed and emotional about it he forgot his nervousness until he suddenly felt something start to breach him.

“Oh!” Alec got out, surprised as he felt the intrusion. “Is that your finger?”

Jace pulled a bit back so he could look at him better, still touching his upper thigh with one hand as he slowly moved the finger he had inside of Alec a bit more, carefully watching his face for his reaction.

“Yes. Is it ok?”

“Yes. A bit odd maybe but not unpleasant,” Alec replied after a moment or two, trying to get used to having something inside of him.

“Good,” Jace said satisfied.

Suddenly Alec’s mind reminded him of his fantasy of taking Jace’s cock inside of him and he moaned at the mental image, trying to push back on the finger. Jace chuckled at his eagerness and soon his whole finger was inside. Jace moved it in and out for a few moments, making Alec whimper in pleasure as he imagined it was Jace’s cock he was having inside of him.

“Ready for another?” Jace asked.

Alec felt his cock start to grow heavy again at his fantasy starting to come to life. He gave Jace a look filled with lust and desire.

“I am ready for you,” Alec pouted, trying to wiggle a bit to get Jace to move faster.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Jace said firmly, using his hand on Alec’s thigh to make him go still again.

“Everything in life has pain,” Alec replied easily, citing one of Maryse’s favorite sayings.

“Not love with me,” Jace said firmly.

The love in Jace’s eyes had Alec swallow dry, tears coming to his eyes. Alec nodded mutely, feeling overwhelmed. He could imagine had things gone differently he would eventually have thrown himself at the first person who showed him any attention, not caring for slow, expecting it to be painful. However, Jace was clearly not having any of that. Alec sent all the love he could through the bond in response.

Gradually Jace added a second finger, starting to move them in and out, making Alec once more focus on the amazing sensations he was feeling.

“That feels…wow,” Alec admitted, fighting to lie still, his hands fisted around the sheets.

After having fucked him open with two fingers Jace withdrew his hand.

“I will add a third now,” Jace warned, looking at Alec who eagerly nodded, having figured out he would need to accept this slow finger process before Jace would actually fuck him for real.

Jace gently added a third finger, stretching and scissoring him open.

“Yes, that’s…” Alec got out, feeling himself stretching and opening up in a way he had never felt before.

Before Alec could finish his sentence Jace curved his fingers just right, hitting the special spot inside of him.

“Fuck!” Alec cried, almost jumping off the bed, waves and waves of pleasure running through him.

“Like that?” Jace teased.

Alec nodded eagerly; he was starting to see the point of this finger thing; it was great!

“Yes. Do it again please,” Alec begged.

“You’re so good, Alec. So good for me,” Jace praised as he kept moving his fingers in and out of him, making sure to hit Alec’s prostate at each thrust inside.

“Fuck, Jace!” Alec panted, feeling precome start to leak from his reawakened cock, his voice sounding completely out of it even to Alec’s own ears.

Alec had a few moments to breathe when Jace pulled his fingers out. However, Alec’s breath got caught again when he saw Jace take his cock in hand and get into position between his legs.

“Ready?” Jace asked.

“Yes,” Alec replied eagerly.

“It will sting a bit but just breathe through it. Get used to it,” Jace advised as he pushed slowly inside, having made sure he was well-informed of what sex with a man involved even though he hadn’t been with one before.

“Oh,” Alec got out, fighting to relax and not tense up, pushing through the burn and discomfort and just focusing on the amazing feel of Jace inside of him.

“So good,” Jace groaned as he felt his cock surrounded by Alec’s tight heat.

He pushed a bit more inside, relishing the feel of being inside Alec in this way. He forced himself to pause and ignore his desire to thrust deeply into his virgin lover.

“How do you feel?” Jace asked, his arms almost shaking from having to hold back but thankfully his blood once more helped him.

“Ok. Full,” Alec admitted in a heated voice, a hint of embarrassment in his tone. “You can go deeper.”

Jace did so, pushing in further and further, making them both whimper with pleasure.

“Wow,” Jace got out when he was fully embedded inside Alec, the feeling unlike any he had ever felt before.

Alec moaned wantonly.

“I can’t believe this is finally happening,” Alec admitted hoarsely, his eyes shining with desire and love.

“It will get better. I was told if I could find this special spot I found before…” Jace got out, fighting to hold back and go slow.

“Fuck!” Alec screamed as waves of pleasure washed over him when Jace hit his prostate on the next thrust into him.

“Got it,” Jace smirked, angling himself so he would hit Alec’s prostate on each thrust.

“Yes!” Alec cried as Jace started up a quick and deep rhythm, making his desire reach new heights.

“You feel so tight and hot around my cock, Alec. So perfect,” Jace said hoarsely, briefly closing his eyes in pleasure.

“I…I think I can come again,” Alec moaned, amazed it was possible, but his pleasure had always been fiercely controlled by his mind and being here with Jace like this was a dream come true. His erection was helped along by feeling Jace’s pleasure as an echo in the bond, emphasizing his own.

Jace claimed Alec’s lips in a sloppy kiss, keeping up his deep thrusts.

“Can you come untouched? Since I realized I love you in this way I have had this fantasy,” Jace admitted in a voice deepened by desire.

“I can,” Alec promised.

Alec moaned as Jace thrust harshly into him in reply, his eyes lighting up golden, his passion and desire echoing in the bond, making Alec smile at him knowing, feeling, he was giving Jace precisely what he wanted.

“Truly?” Jace marveled.

“When I have fantasized about you, I have a few times come untouched,” Alec got out between moans and groans.

“That’s _so_ hot!” Jace admitted, his thrusts speeding up at the very idea he had that effect on Alec.

“Fuck me harder, use your full strength. I need to feel you,” Alec begged or commanded, it was hard to tell.

“Fuck! You are so perfect, falling apart so beautifully on my cock, my marks on your hips and neck,” Jace replied hoarsely as he stopped holding back, enjoying letting go, enjoying finally having a lover that wanted everything he could give and more.

Jace made sure his hands on Alec’s hips were a strong and steady presence, reassuring Alec of his love by leaving marks behind.

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” Alec cried as the whole bed shook with the force of Jace’s thrusts.

“Everything you dreamed of?” Jace asked breathlessly, his eyes golden, never once slowing down as he kept pumping into his lover.

“Yes! More! More!” Alec got out, his cock rock-hard and leaking precome.

“Gonna come for me, babe?” Jace asked lustfully, moaning when he felt Alec’s body tighten in response to his words.

“Fuck! Yes!” Alec yelled loudly, coming all over their stomachs.

“Alec!” Jace cried as the feeling of Alec tightening around him and the echoes in the bond forced him over the edge yet again.

Alec’s second orgasm combined with feeling the echoes of Jace’s orgasm in the bond had Alec blacking out for a moment. When he came to, he saw that Jace had cleaned them up and even gotten a glass of water from the bathroom.

“Here,” Jace said gently, offering him the water as he sat down on the bedside next to him, giving him a tender look.

“Thanks,” Alec replied hoarsely, finishing it, and handing it back, feeling completely drained and used in all the right ways.

Jace put the glass back on the nightstand and then got into bed, smiling happily when Alec instantly snuggled up to him with a satisfied smile on his lips.

“You ok?” Jace asked tenderly, stroking Alec’s hair lovingly.

“Yes. Just a bit sore but in a good way,” Alec assured him with a smile.

Jace laughed at that before he claimed Alec’s lips in a possessive kiss.

“I take full responsibility for that,” Jace teased.

“You should,” Alec said with pretended offence. Then he gave Jace a searching look, groaning as he realized, “You will always look this annoyingly fresh and together after sex, won’t you?”

Jace nodded, grinning as he replied, “Yes. Pure Angel-blood, remember?”

Alec smiled amused but then his mind made him worry again. He eyed Jace concerned, biting his lower lip anxiously.

“I hope I can keep up with you. I mean Clary has pure angel-blood too. If you two …” Alec started to say.

“Alec, you don’t need to keep up with me at all. I am flattered I can bring you such pleasure,” Jace insisted, interrupting him in a strong and certain voice.

“You sure?” Alec asked, relieved but still hesitant.

“Feel the bond. You know I am telling you the truth,” Jace assured him in a soft tone.

“I don’t have to. I know you would never lie to me,” Alec said seriously.

“Never,” Jace swore heartfelt.

“I love you. Thanks so much for being mine. You could have had anyone and yet you chose me,” Alec said emotionally, gratefully.

“I love you too and Alec, I am happy and privileged to call you mine. I know now that you were always _the_ _one_ ,” Jace replied with a softness Alec knew was only ever for him.

This time it was Alec who stole a kiss, filled with promise, love and affection. When Alec laid his head back down on Jace’s shoulder and Jace wrapped his arms around him Alec sighed contentedly. Jace kissed the top of Alec’s head tenderly and his smile widened when he realized the pattern Alec was drawing on his arm was, _I love you_.

When Jace and Alec fell asleep that night, wrapped in each other’s arms, they knew that while this step had changed their relationship, it had in many ways simply cemented the vows they had already given each other. The vow to always be there for each other, to always put the other first, to love each other from now on and till the end, together in life or death, whatever may come. Alone they were strong but together they were unbeatable!

_The end_

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment or kudos if you enjoyed the story. Would mean the world to me. 💛💛


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